Award time again

(4/30/2009) Updated to add Kylie to award presenters.



So this week I've been awarded two separate awards. I am definitely a zombie chicken. I am definitely not a sexy blogger. Thanks to Random Chick (who recognizes my zombie tendencies) and both Karen and Kylie (both of whom obviously need a trip to the optometrist).

I found Megan's phone!

Just because

That should have been my idea

Because I follow Megarific everywhere (semi-stalker like), I'll do the same meme that's over on her blog. The idea is to list the movie, song, candy, and invention you wished you had thought up before anyone else. So, without further ado, here is my list:




















Movie: Blazing Saddles
I only could wish to be half as brilliant as Mel Brooks. This is definitely not one of the most intellectual films you will ever see, but for my money it is one of the funniest. It is non-stop laughs from the beginning to the final credits. "More beans Mr. Taggert? I think you boys have had enough."

Song: That Was A Crazy Game of Poker
This is the top two most played songs on my iPod... both the album version and live version from Madison Square Garden. It never fails to make me smile and put a bounce in my step. There really isn't a good version on you tube, but this one is the best I could find.











Candy: Snickers
It's chocolate, it's peanuts, it's caramel, it's nouget, it's perfect.










Oh wait, it's almonds now too. This one might be even better than perfect.








Invention: Baconnaise
What more could you possibly ask for as a sandwich topper? The creamy moist goodness of mayonnaise combined with the greatness of bacon flavor. When you are "on the go" and don't have time to fry up a batch of bacon, slather on a healthy amount of baconnaise and you have an instant club sandwich!

I'm still alive

I'm still alive. I don't have any worth writing about. I'm mostly just walking around in circles until something happens, good or bad. I'm a very boring person lately. Sorry folks.

Saturday morning

Saturday morning at the Abode of Bobness. What I have done is connect the monitor from my old desktop computer to my laptop. I also splurged and spent the bucks for the mlb.tv season long package. I can watch every major league baseball game (either home or away broadcasts) on my computer, either live or recorded. Therefore, I can watch the NESN feed of my beloved Red Sox anytime of day or night, especially since many of their east coast games start while I am still at work.

The beauty of the second monitor is that it makes it possible for me to watch the game in full screen while still using my full laptop screen for blogging, chatting, game playing, etc. No more having to choose between watching the game or writing compelling posts like this one. Now I can do both on a Saturday morning while lounging on my couch and sipping my Caribou Coffee.

Just an update: My doctor has informed me that my EKG was fine, chest x-ray checked out normal, and my lab work looks good including blood counts, chemistries, and cholesterol. I've gotten a referral for a cardiologist to set up an appointment for a stress test. It is reassuring that things initially appear to be ok, but unsettling not knowing why I'm so tired, weak, with some chest tightness. Looks like you all might be stuck with me being around for a while.

Blogoversary

It all started one year ago today. I don't really remember why I began blogging. I was aware of what blogging was, but never really considered starting one of my own until someone I knew started one. Being a computer geek and having an affinity for writing, I'm surprised it took me that long. I was doing it for me, having no idea that anyone would either read it or heaven forbid actually follow it. Did I hope I would become an overnight sensation? No. Did I want others to read it? Deep down, sure I did.

It has kind of been all over the place since then. Sometimes funny, sometimes political, sometimes reflective, sometimes depressing, but always genuine. For the most part, you never really have to guess what kind of mood or mental disposition I am in. I feel like I've written good pieces, things just to fill up space, and had a fleeting romance with temporary fencing securing temporary fencing. You've learned about my obsession with lobster footwear, a never ending battle with the demons that occupy my brain, and some of the other things that make up just bob.

I've "met" a great group of supportive people. How I found you, or you found me, or why you continue to put up with me I don't know. I never would have imagined people from as far away as Australia would become friends (and even send Tim Tams). I never could have expected to form the kind of bonding relationships I have with all of you. The openness with which you share your lives, your successes and failures, your hopes and dreams, is really quite amazing. The way all of you have accepted me with all of my faults and ever changing mental states is heartwarming and means so much to me. The mutual caring that goes on amongst this group is inspiring. You're a great group of people and hold a special place in my heart and thoughts.

So, day one of year two starts here. I don't know what direction this blog will take, just as I don't know what direction my life will take. It may not be the most interesting or glitzy existence, but it's mine. I'll continue to bring you along, if you care to keep following. I'm humbled and honored that you take the time to read, comment, and care. For something that started as a vehicle to vent and write, it certainly has become much more. That's because of the wonderful people who make it that way.

Since everyone is speculating...

Here is the deal. I've been really weak and tired. Not I didn't get enough sleep tired, more like I can barely make it through the work day tired, weak and fatigued. I've been having some chest tightness and shortness of breath at times I should have neither. Also there have been some issues with my stomach and daily "movements."

So... I've had a series of blood tests, urine tests, EKG, chest x-ray, will do a stool sampling this weekend, and meet with a cardiologist for a stress test once a referral is set up.

This all could do with either my lifestyle or my depression/anxiety, but it could be something unrelated. If/when anything physical has been ruled out, then I can address the other issues. Until all the tests are done, I won't know any more than that.

jb and The Brain, Act IV

The Brain: Are things messed up down there too?
jb (just bob): I'm not sure, that's why we went to see a doctor.
The Brain: Must be serious for you to go to a doctor.
jb: Something is not quite right, and it is different from anything else before
The Brain: Are you worried?
jb: I'm concerned enough to see someone. There are still a few more tests to run.
The Brain: I'll do what I can for you
jb: I know, but you may not have any control of what is going on down here this time
The Brain: So when are we going to know something?
jb: Not for a few weeks probably, maybe sooner.
The Brain: That seems like a long time to wait
jb: I guess these things take some time
The Brain: That doesn't make it any easier.
jb: Yeah, tell me about it.
The Brain: We'll get through this, both of us
jb: Yep... we are in this together

Happy Easter

Hopefully the Easter Bunny will visit your homes today.
(I'll have something a little more serious later)

Theme Thursday - Egg

Ever wonder what Humpty Dumpty was doing up on that wall? I mean seriously, if you were an egg wouldn't you be a little bit more careful than sitting atop a high wall? Was he up there trying to get a tan, wanting desperately to be a brown egg?

What caused Humpty Dumpty to fall? Obviously he was an oval, so he was more inclined to tumble because of his rotund bottom. Was he knocked over by a strong gust of wind? Was there an earthquake that shook him down?

And why exactly did the king send all of his horses and all of his men to Humpty Dumpty's place? Was he a friend of the king? Or was there something much more sinister going on?

Here's my theory... Humpty Dumpty sat on the wall because he was a peeping tom. He was looking through the window of the neighbor's home, watching the lady of the house in various states of undress. In a fit of rage, the neighbor's husband brandished a firearm and began to shoot at Humpty Dumpty. In an effort to evade the bullets, Humpty Dumpty with his rotund oval bottom lost his balance and took his now famous great fall. The King, now remorseful about shooting at one of his citizens, dispatched all of his horses and all of his men to the scene of the tragic accident. The King knew the public would never stand for this kind of blind violence against the common man, so all of the horses and all of the men concocted an elaborate story about trying to save good old Humpty Dumpty. It was a stroke of genius. The King's spin machine went into action, framing the facts to make it appear the King was distraught about the fate of his neighbor and rallied all of his resources to rescue Humpty. And so it goes... a legend is born.

It was either that, or O.J. did it. Hopefully this cracked you up.

Boston - March 2009

The Routine

The alarm goes off and the routine starts:

The adrenaline and shock that wakes me up doesn't go away. You know that nervous, jumpy feeling you get when someone yells BOO! behind you? It feels like that but doesn't subside until I'm finally home at night. The coffee is already made, the timer having been set the night before. It's decaffeinated now as I can't drink too much of the regular anymore because of the nerves. About half way through that first cup of decaf, my stomach starts to churn. It's a feeling that can only be described as heartburn in the top of my chest, and Taco Bell's revenge in my colon. The pepto tablets stuffed in my office drawer will take care of that when I get there. I pull into the parking garage at work, my heart rate accelerates and my breathing becomes shallow. I stop to remind myself to take deep, cleansing breaths. I can only imagine how I look to those walking around me, exhaling like a woman going through a painful labor.

Finally at my office, the first thing I do after opening the door is look for a flashing red light on my phone. Any voice mail before 8:30am is never good news. I start my computer, get the coffee started, and pop those two peptos to keep my rumbling stomach silenced. I've switched the office over to half-caffeine coffee. I joke and tell them it's so I can drink twice as much; when in reality it is so I don't spin out of control in a dangerous combination of jumpy nerves and racing heartbeat mixed with a caffeine overdose. The day progresses, some better than others, some worse than average, but rarely ever comfortable or pleasant. I don't leave exactly at 5:01pm, not wanting to give the impression that I'm dying to get out of there. So generally between 5:15-5:30 I'll button things up. "I've had enough fun for the day," I'll tell the folks in the finance department as I lock my office and make my departure.

I can feel my shoulders slump, the tension on them easing and allowing them back to their natural position. The heart rate returns back to semi-normal, only interrupted by the normal aggravation of driving downtown in a large city. It will take hours to unwind once I get home. Occasionally a stress headache will interrupt the process, demanding to be quelled before any other relaxing can take place. Gone thankfully are the days when I would self medicate myself with alcohol to speed things along. Most nights it is a gentle landing, easing into comfort zone to read, watch TV or blog. Some times it is a crash landing; with the weight of the world finally lifted I fall asleep on the couch before 8:00pm. I usually awake in time to set the timer on the coffee maker and go to bed before midnight. Some times peace doesn't come, leaving me to turn restlessly in my bed wishing for any kind of beneficial sleep. On those nights I wash down a Tylenol PM with a glass of milk.

Sleep eventually overtakes me, and another weeknight is over. The alarm goes off and the routine starts anew with the rising of the sun.

Theme Thursday - Ten

When 10 came out in 1979, I was 12 years old and just beginning to really notice the fairer sex as more than just girls. Of course at the time I was no where near old enough to actually see this movie, but I vividly remember the commercials and advertisements. Bo Derek was my first celebrity crush as a soon-to-be teenager. She was so gorgeous and the famous running on the beach poster above did nothing to discourage a youngster from wanting to find out more about her and other girls. There would be many other celebrity fascinations as I continued to age, but Bo Derek will always be my first crush. She set the benchmark for what a "10" would be for years to come.